
In our fast-paced, modern world, emotions often feel like an inconvenience. Yet they are one of the most vital aspects of our human experience, shaping our thoughts, behaviours, and interactions. Over the years, I’ve discovered that mastering emotional intelligence (EQ) is not just helpful—it’s transformative. Recently, I had the privilege of sitting down with Joshua Freedman, CEO of Six Seconds and a leading expert in emotional intelligence, to delve into this topic. His insights were profound and practical, offering a roadmap to enhance relationships, improve performance, and lead a more fulfilling life.
What is emotional intelligence?
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognise, understand, and manage our own emotions while also being attuned to the emotions of others. Unlike IQ, which remains relatively fixed throughout life, EQ can be cultivated and refined.
Joshua describes EQ as a practical intelligence—one that allows us to harness the data emotions provide. “Emotions are signals,” he explained. “They inform us about our environment, relationships, and internal states. The key is learning to interpret this data and respond intentionally rather than react impulsively.”
Why emotional intelligence matters
Research shows that EQ is critical in both personal and professional contexts. Here’s why:
Improved decision-making: Emotional intelligence helps us stay calm under pressure and make better decisions.
Stronger relationships: EQ fosters empathy, active listening, and effective communication, building trust and connection.
Better health: By learning to manage emotions, we can reduce stress and its physiological impacts.
Enhanced performance: High EQ individuals perform better in high-stress situations, as they can maintain focus and regulate their emotional state.
Understanding and managing emotions
One of Joshua’s most compelling points is that emotions are not the problem—it’s how we handle them that matters. He emphasises the importance of developing emotional literacy, or the ability to name and understand feelings.
“We often think of emotions as a jumbled mess,” he said. “But by taking the time to identify and label them, we gain clarity and control.” Joshua suggests using metaphors, colours, or physical sensations to articulate emotions when words feel insufficient. This approach helps create a deeper awareness of our inner world and provides a foundation for effective emotional management.
Practical strategies for building emotional intelligence
Joshua shared several actionable tips for anyone looking to improve their EQ:
Acknowledge your feelings: Start by naming the emotion without judgement. For example, “I feel frustrated” or “I feel anxious.”
Understand the source: Ask yourself, “What triggered this feeling?” and “What is this emotion trying to tell me?”
Respond constructively: Instead of reacting impulsively, choose actions aligned with your values and goals.
Cultivate empathy: Make an effort to see situations from others’ perspectives, which improves social awareness and deepens connections.
Engage in reflective practices: Journaling, meditation, or simply taking a walk can help you process emotions and gain clarity.
Emotional intelligence in leadership and parenting
For leaders and parents, developing EQ is about more than personal growth—it’s about setting the tone for those around you. As Joshua pointed out, leaders with high emotional intelligence create a culture where people feel valued and understood, which can boost morale and performance.
Parents, too, can model emotional intelligence for their children. By validating a child’s feelings and teaching them to name and process emotions, parents can lay the groundwork for a lifetime of healthy emotional habits.
The science behind emotional intelligence
The impact of EQ goes beyond anecdotal evidence; science backs it up. Research shows that emotional intelligence:
Reduces stress and improves heart health.
Enhances problem-solving and cognitive flexibility.
Improves relationships by fostering trust and open communication.
Interestingly, Joshua highlighted that simply naming emotions can begin to neutralise their intensity. “When we identify what we’re feeling, it shifts the brain’s response,” he explained. “We’re no longer stuck in the emotion—we can start to work with it.”
Why emotions are not the enemy
One of the most important lessons I took from our conversation is that emotions are not inherently good or bad—they’re data. As Joshua put it, “There’s no such thing as a negative emotion. Each feeling provides valuable information about our needs, opportunities, or potential threats.”
By shifting our perspective, we can move from seeing emotions as obstacles to viewing them as allies in navigating life’s complexities.
My takeaways
As someone passionate about human performance and personal development, my conversation with Joshua was a reminder of the power of emotional intelligence. Developing EQ is not about perfection—it’s about progress. It’s about learning to pause, reflect, and respond intentionally, even in the face of life’s challenges.
Whether you’re a leader, a parent, or simply someone striving for self-improvement, emotional intelligence is a skill worth investing in. As Joshua said, “EQ isn’t just about managing emotions—it’s about integrating them into who we are, so we can live and work more effectively.”
Moving forward
If you’d like to learn more about Joshua Freedman’s work or explore resources on emotional intelligence, I encourage you to visit Six Seconds. And remember, developing EQ is a journey. Start small, stay curious, and allow yourself the grace to grow.
Thank you for reading. If this topic resonated with you, please share your thoughts or pass it along to someone who might find it helpful. Together, we can all learn to navigate life with greater emotional intelligence.